3.5 Decades Later...

I am 3 and a half decades older. When summarized into that context, it's somewhat daunting but amusing still for some strange apparent reason. This picture was taken at Mary's Secret Garden, the vegan restaurant located in my home city of Ventura, Ca. My friends Joel and Sabine drove from SB to have a post Leo birthday dinner celebration. The food, as always, was delicious and Mary surprised us with a complimentary dessert pictured above. Beautiful and blissful. Just like my Life. The only regret I have was not communing with Nature on my actual birthday which is August 13th. Next year, I vow, I will not be making that mistake again. Even if it means spending it alone. Which, I'm sure for some, sounds cumbersome and unnecessary. For me, listening to my intuition is Key. Compromising and/or sacrificing my innate happiness for attachments to previous celebratory routines, I have found, to be riddled with strife, loneliness and overall unhappiness. And please, dear readers, do not be confused with a false sense of unappreciation. It is through these experiences that I have come to this awakened clarity of traditions revolving around my birth. Rest assured, my goal is to make the most of what has been given and thus far...I have rarely been disappointed. In my Life that is. Disappointments, I have perceived, are expectations not communicated nor met and not in alignment with the Unconditional and the Now. And that, my Beloveds, is for another time.... <3

One Love. One Loob....

As I sit here,
reflecting on
what has come
to pass....
memories and dreams
flood
the inside
of my eyelids
and painted murals
decorate
the inner chambers
held Sacred
in my mind.

It seems surreal,
these
vivid depictions
of sharing circles
and performances,
but the
evidence
left behind
begs to differ.

And it hits me....

All those lonely nights,
all the times
I thought
no one would understand...

That integral part of me
feeling so lost
and confused....
trying to ignore
the ache
and emptiness
of something
always.............
.........missing.........

I searched and searched.

Traveling far and wide.

To places that were hidden.

To realms
only the truly stubborn
could find.

I went within
the confines
of my own subconscious.

Into dreams
that appeared
to be
nonsensical
only hinting
of wisdom
and ancient knowledge.

I jumped
out of
airplanes.

Spoke with
Scotland's fairies.

Sang with
the blue butterflies
of Costa Rica.

I danced
on the
Etheric
in a
fire ritual
with the
Ancestors
of the
Dagara Tribe.

I entered
the womb
of the
Mother
on the land
of the Chumash
multiple times
and purified
my troubled soul.

I drank in
the sweetness
of the jasmine
flowers
and swam
in the healing waters
of Hawaii.

I collected.

I nurtured.

I breathed in
Ohana and Aloha,
Pura Vida and Monteverde....
finding communities
within
Findhorn,
Malidoma,
Ojai and
every city I visited...

and yet...

I felt
a strong affinity
with All.

It felt close.
So close.

But,
it was
as if
the thinnest layer,
almost invisible,
was keeping
the picture
fuzzy
and
out of focus.

And perhaps,
this Path
around the globe
and
the inner
excavation
within
was what
I needed
to find
what I
had been
looking for
all along.

Kapwa.

Loob.

My Tribe.

The arduous
but rewarding
journey
led me
to come

Full Circle.

To the Beginning...

Where
all these
elements
came together
to....

Welcome Us All.... Home.....

To Keep

I have a secret
but I can't tell you
what it is

And, no
you can't guess
even if you get it right

I'll just shake my head
and smile

Because I have a secret

And it's for me
to keep
and not share
with anyone
else...

Such is Life

I am humbled
By the stillness
Of this water

One touch
Of my finger
Sends ripples
Of waves
That extend out
Like large rings of portents

A prophetic epiphany
Inevitable
But
Uncertain of its reception...

'Such is Life'

Decadence in every sip...

Peanut butter, bananas, vanilla hemp milk with hazelnut chocolate sauce. Vegan. Gluten free. Heaven. Cosmic orgasmic bliss...